day something, 2021 no day number recorded, just for laughs this time

so its been a while and i dont even really know why I do this thing..

but that doesn’t mean I’m getting rid of it. for one, i still need to get back into therapy, because my old one quit when he turned 80. but i just like the idea of having a professional person to talk to that doesn’t unwarrantedly talk shit, and has some training into the mechanization of the human mind. it’s comforting somewhat, and i don’t dislike it.

finding a good one is tricky, most of them are too judge-mental or too busy taking notes. Jim, the last one, didn’t take notes and I loved that about him. It was incredible because it literally just felt like a friend who occasionally asked very specific questions after a while, he was a very wonderful therapist. I asked him how he remembered stuff and he said he just listened with an open heart an open pair of ears, person to person.

I wonder how many therapists out there are like that. He said also that he didn’t judge, but always listened with curiosity and would occasionally ask things in a very particular way to aide in his understanding of things, if it wasn’t making sense to him as to why I was talking about a certain thing, much like a friend would do. Jim was neat.

I didn’t intend on writing about that, but it’s not an issue anyway. I opened the client without any idea what I wanted to write about.

Most of you who are tech folks like tech things. I don’t. I was explaining this to a friend today, I like it when computers just work, I don’t like working to make computers work, or finding out how to fix them when they are not. I did when I was younger, and thats where the money in computer work is, but it’s not fun as a job, it’s not even fun when you’re not getting paid. I’d rather smash it than fix it, so it’s not a good match to (and I’m joking, I’d rather just leave it alone and go outside if it’s being stubborn and ignore it..) It’s too, “alien.” at least most people or most physical type tasks give clear indication as to why something isn’t working,without having to learn specialized languages or error codes to understand it. Safe to say I am not a computer techno junkie anymore, and I am fully okay with that.

In my twenties I had a closet with ten computers though, at least it sounded like there were ten but there were actually four in there. and I had four monitors, it was ridiculous.... There was no need for that but I thought there was at the time. On the left was linux, then a bsd server, then a windows box fully tilted to the hilt, i had hacked the registry a great deal and made it very very stable.. i had gotten windows xp running for 439 days without having to reboot it, and it only needed to reboot because a power outage from a storm had turned it off... I was using it daily for photoshop, and firefox with about 80 tabs running.. it was ridiculously robust... had basically re-configured the kernel to the point where there were two system services running.. kernel32.dll and sys.bat or something of that nature, so the thing could turn on and access a dos shell. otherwise, there was not a damn thing running on it, and it was literally the most stable implementation of windows i’ve ever used.. it was the original unpatched release cd build as well, no service packs.. build 2600... funny as it were.

2600 are good folks btw, most people think they’re dirty hackers, they’re not. they’re much more interested in just having a nice life, and they do make a cool magazine though.

anyway this post has no point, so i’m done now...


oh and irc is not dead. it will never be dead. but if you freenode, forget about that im not following it, but the whole thing is a damn mess...

with love! over and out

oh and i ran into my neighbor today the girl with the dredlocks, we talked for a half hour or so then my friend from san francisco came over because she was in the area, and i hadnt seen her since 2008! that was super cool and we hung out for a few hours, and chatted :) it was really nice to see her again. my cat hissed, but eventually warmed up to her, which is good because she’s a friendly cat, and my friend is a nice person. :) i wanted the two to get along.

~ Ramo / Omar / Doctor-Beans / citizen of earth